Those Who Have Crossed Over........40

When I was in my 20’s I started longing  to be in my 40s? It wasn’t that I didn't  have any fun. I was having the time of my life: married, no kids, double income, busy in ministry, traveling the world to help other people. I loved my life. But something seemed to be missing as I soaked up the words of my 40 year old friends. First of all, the fact that a 40 year old (mature) woman would spend more than 5 minutes in conversation with me…..is  total miracle! Why? because as a 20 something year old, I was a “know it all” who viewed life thru the eyes of today with no care for the future. Voting was optional, kids were definite and I was gonna be a definite good mom. I was always right, you were wrong.

As you well know, not every 40 year old woman embodies these traits below. Goodness, I know women in their 60s that still don't have their heads on right. Then again, I've met women in their 20s and 30s who peeked early in life.....boo on them! :) These are merely my young observations...not facts! So what was it that I saw in those 40 year old women that caused me to temporarily wish away my 20s? I noticed a few things about them.

           

1. They don’t care what others think. It isn’t that they are unmindful

of othes' opinions; they are just not allowing those opinions to clout or leverage their fashion, values, or physical shape! They are untainted by the insignificant values that pour out of culture of today.

            2. They are resolute moms with a passionate purpose in life. They don’t seem

            to be mindlessly wandering through the forest of morals/values. Their minds are made up on what

            is best for their kids.

            3. They know what they want to be as a grown up! They are actively pursuing

            their dreams, hobbies, and job of choice. It is never too late to start back to

            School or start training for a marathon. Why not?

            4. Dating their hubby is a deep conviction that they wouldn’t sell. Date nights

            are precious, common, and most of all fun. Because they actually live with their man

            and choose not to merely co-exist, they respect their best friend. They choose not to 

            degrade him in public or private. They protect him at all costs and boasts of his strengths.

            5. They are at peace with their feminine shape. They have gracefully accepted the

            battle scars, stretch marks, and any other mommy ‘medals’ that come along with

            age and parenthood. That doesn’t mean they embrace the idea of letting the body die to waste and

            junk food. It just means they don’t fret over the scars, wrinkles, and shapes that

            they cannot control or change. Fix what they can, welcome the rest.

            6. They stop taking theirselves so seriously and instead take life a little more

            seriously. Voting is important, recycling is a good habit, and visiting all

            the food groups, not just the breads and desserts, becomes a healthy life style.

            Diets don’t exist, just healthy eating plans.

            7. The need to be heard and liked by everyone at the party becomes obsolete.

            They are the ones at parties that have conjured up a small group of other

            women and are just enjoying the conversation of a few instead of the eyes of

            many! Listening is more important than speaking.

            8. Topic of conversation seems to be less about decorating, new toys, and

            fashion and more about the future of  family, our country, and compassion

            for other people.

            9. They are open to others' opinions and are not always bent on being right. They are willing to

            hear what others say before expressing theirselves, and at times holding back

            and wisely choosing their words.

10. They see the big picture in life! Life isn’t about her but Him and understanding how He uses her to serve everyone else. Life is bigger than her.  She is only a part of this temporal time on earth. Bottom line- she gives everything over to God. 

Now, I still have 3 more years to go before I cross over and thank goodness! I could barely cross out 2 of those traits listed above. So there is hope; I have 3 more years to grow! But I am enjoying today and looking forward to tomorrow. No looking backwards.........that causes serious tripping and knocking into things like pride, self-pity and other ugly traits. 

I have been graciously blessed by many seasoned women who have entered life ahead of me with elegance, wisdom, and a spirit of humility. They continue to leave deep impressions on my soul with their gentle guiding and leading. Thank you Lori, Janie, Sheryl, Robin, Maryanne, Lisa, Julie, Barbara, Marcia and Amy, Kineka, Helen, and Mom. If their names don't give away their generation, then what does! I love it! I was inspired to write this as my friends Julie and Diana approach a new decade in the next few weeks. They are amazingly beautiful women who have greatly inspired me :)

And yes........that is me when I was in third grade with my BFF. Here I am many decades later with a daughter the same age as I was in that picture. Life really does fly!